| Read Only Wrongness |
[May. 8th, 2009|09:31 am] |
I deleted my account without notice last month, but in my haste I forgot about one thing - this is the only place I read some of you! The brevity of Facebook is irritating, but I find nobody wants to read a diatribe either. Cute or Kill? is still raging on in blogger format, though largely in the interest of design. I'm even converting some old but good LJ design entries to the new site.
In the meantime, I've archived everything here but am deleting all entries except the infamous Tales of Wrongness (find them with the wrongness tag). These are the only things I will continue to write in this space. Expect plenty of them as they're always entertaining.
If you branch out into other areas (Facebook, Blogger, Flickr), let me know where you're most active so we can stay in touch.
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| Billie's Blues now even bluer |
[Apr. 13th, 2009|09:30 pm] |
Once again I find myself fixing some lyrical misinformation. Not even a year ago I nailed down the Billie Holiday version of Lester Young's classic "I Cover the Waterfront" because it suffered so much mangling. Tonight I repeat the process for one of Billie's own, "Billie's Blues." To be fair, some of the errors are introduced by mingling the Carmen McRae cover in with Billie's lyrics. Billie was known to improvise as well, but this is how it is in several recordings I've heard. Some of these transcribers must have cotton in their ears. The errors end up on commercial sites, too.
Retarded Version
I love my man
I'm a liar if I say I don't
I love my man
I'm a liar if I say I don't
But I'll quit my man
I'm a liar if I say I won't
I've been your slave, baby
Ever since I've been your babe
I've been your slave
Ever since I've been your babe
But before I be your dog
I'll see you in your grave
My man wouldn't give me no breakfast
Wouldn't give me no dinner
Fought about my supper and put me outdoors
Had the dark clay make black spots on my clothes
I didn't have so many
But I had a long, long way to go
I ain't good-looking
And my hair ain't curled
I ain't good-looking
And my hair ain't curled
But my mother, she gave me something
That's gonna tear me through this world
Some men like me talkin' happy
Some calls it snappy
Some call me honey
Others think i got money
Some tell me baby you're built for speed
Now if you put that all together
It makes me everything a good man needs | Billie Version
I love my man
I'm a liar if I say I don't
I love my man
I'm a liar if I say I don't
But I'll quit my man
I'm a liar if I say I won't
I've been your slave, baby
Ever since I've been your babe
I've been your slave
Ever since I've been your babe
But before I'll be your dog
I'll see you in your grave
My man wouldn't give me no breakfast
Wouldn't give me no dinner
Squawked about my supper then he put me out the doors
Had the nerve to lay a matchbox on my clothes
I didn't have so many
But I had a long,long ways to go
I ain't good-looking
And my hair ain't curls
I ain't good-looking
And my hair ain't curls
But my mother, she give me something
It's gonna carry me through this world
Some men like me 'cause I'm happy
Some 'cause I'm snappy
Some call me honey
Others think I've got money
Some tell me "Billie,
Baby you're built for speed."
Now if you put that all together
Makes me everything a good man needs |
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| Little Boxes of Carver Hills |
[Feb. 8th, 2009|01:48 am] |
Are any of you pioneers of Atlanta gentrification? If you are, you should really consider this little 'hood located inside the northwest (more west than north) corner of 285. Mary George Avenue, Abner Terrace and nearby streets are comprised of high slopes peppered with little midcentury modern houses - many of which have fantastic views of the city. The home values are generally less than $100K. Better still, the crummy ones can be had for about the price of a cheeseburger right now.
The only problem, of course, is the crime potential associated with the west end. The bright side is that as new development continues to creep down from Vinings along Cumberland Parkway and radiates out from Atlantic Station, this middle might prosper (albeit at the cost of destroying the cute houses most likely).
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| Cool |
[Jul. 16th, 2008|07:43 pm] |
I looked everywhere for Pylon's anthem of obscurity - including the sleeve to Gyrate - but I haven't been able to find the lyrics. Instead, the task of transcription became my own. If you know the song yourself, help me verify these lyrics:
You-ou-ou-our form
Rea-ea-ea-eal gone
Li-i-i-ike wild
Goo-oo-oo-ood vibe
Everything is, everything is, everything is, everything is, everything is, everything is coooooooool
There are these forms I like to watch
There are these shapes which talk to me
There are these forms I like to watch
There are these shapes which talk to me
I like forms
And forms like me
The more you look
The more you see |
In one of the thousands of projects that are half formed in my head, I wanted to use this song in a movie. |
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| Monolithic Living |
[May. 27th, 2008|01:07 pm] |
Despite my collector tendencies (and recent declaration of Hollywood Regency leanings - what was I thinking?), I've decided to re-examine the furnishings in order to get peace and quiet. By this I mean that I'm tired of furniture that makes noise. Whether vintage or new, everything has a squeak or wobble.
The new direction is not simply one of minimalism. The emphasis will be placed on items made from few materials and few parts. No moving parts = no noise! I already had great success with some chairs I regret having sold - Starck "Bo" for Driade - but other generous, sturdy, plastic chairs are at the top of the list along with this clever glass coffee table.
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| Children make the best accessories. |
[May. 26th, 2008|11:58 am] |
I have an obsession with Suri Cruise - not an eepy-cray obsession but an obsession nonetheless. Is there anyone alive more fashionable than this tot? Despite the Scientology heritage, she inspires me to create new life...
...for fashion! To think I could have a wee one walking about with half my genes wearing Christian Louboutin sandals (Suri's their youngest client). Every minutia would be press worthy!
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| Recovering "I Cover the Waterfront" |
[May. 16th, 2008|11:25 pm] |
"I Cover the Waterfront" is one of my favorite jazz classics - especially Billie Holiday's definitive version. She is often incorrectly attributed as the writer (Lester Young, 1947). It's a shame that nobody besides Lester and Billie ever get the lyrics right, though.
Sinatra* popularized a butchered arrangement that begins with the chorus and leaves out the entire intro. Even Armstrong recorded a super-spaz version that was all over the place. Today it continues to be covered very poorly - something not at all helped by the lyrical errors posted all over the Internet.
The root of most of the errors originates with Warner Brothers Music Corp. These get copied or even have new errors introduced by people mishearing Billie. After many pages of Google, I couldn't find a single correct version! The stupidest part is that the errors defy conventions of common English and logic. Compare them below.
Retarded Version
Away from the city that hurts and knocks
I'm standing alone by the desolate docks
In the still and the chill of the night
I see the horizon, the great unknown
My heart has an ache, it says heavy as stone
Will the dawn come along and make it last?
I cover the waterfront
I'm watching the sea
Will the one that I love be coming back to me?
I cover the waterfront
In search of my love
And I'm covered by a starless sky above
Here am I patiently waiting
Hoping and longing
Oh, how I yearn
Where are you?
Have you thought back time?
Do you remember?
Will you return?
I cover the waterfront
I'm watching the sea
Will the one that I love be coming back to me? | Lester/Billie Version
Away from the city that hurts and mocks
I'm standing alone by the desolate docks
In the still and the chill of the night
I see the horizon, the great unknown
My heart has an ache, it's as heavy as stone
Will the dawn coming on make it light?
I cover the waterfront
I'm watching the sea
Will the one I love be coming back to me?
I cover the waterfront
In search of my love
And I'm covered by a starlit sky above
Here am I, patiently waiting
Hoping and longing
Oh, how I yearn
Where are you?
Have you forgotten?
Will you remember?
Will you return?
I cover the waterfront
I'm watching the sea
Will the one I love be coming back to me?
Will the one I love be coming back to me? |
Does anyone have the Elysian Fields' cover?
* I never thought Sinatra was anything special: white bread. Shoot me if you must. |
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| Mainlining the Imagicillin |
[Apr. 2nd, 2008|12:23 am] |
Have you been to Babyland General, birthplace of Cabbage Patch Kids? I can willingly suspend my disbelief long enough to enjoy many episodes of Doctor Who or even reality television, but I don't think I could cut doing what the lady below (not the one in the hat - that's Xavier Roberts) has to. I think I'd kill myself if I had to pull dolls out of the cabbage vage all day while administering Imagicillin with a smile. There is even an adoption ceremony complete with sworn oaths and shit! Still, a trip there would be fun if only to observe the weird middle aged southern ladies who'd rather buy another crappy piece of cute than anything else.
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| Putting the Fun in Fundies |
[Mar. 28th, 2008|08:52 pm] |
As I was filling the tank with gas at Sam's Club today, some dude in a truck thrust his hand in my direction with a pamphlet and said, "Here. I think you need one of these." The pamphlet was one of those crudely drawn comic book tracts urging you to save your soul and spend every waking moment of your life appeasing the omnipotent sky daddy - you know the ones. To this I replied, "No thank you. I don't have time for crazy today." He seemed bewildered for a second and silently recoiled probably out of fear that the lightning would arc over to him after it struck me.
What he did wouldn't be such a bother. Every company does the same thing trying to sell me their brand, but this was a rather presumptive pitch. "Need," indeed! Does my appearance just scream heathen?
I wonder how the public would take to my passing out pamphlets promoting sanity and reason? Perhaps I could encourage them to read Sagan's The Demon-Haunted World. Perhaps they would punch me and tell me to go to Hell, too. |
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| New to Me Wave |
[Mar. 15th, 2008|11:12 pm] |
How the Hell did I miss Slow Children? It's like Missing Persons and The Waitresses had a sexy love child in the earliest 80s! Dig these tracks (on YouTube):
Slow Children - Vanessa VascillatingSlow Children - One More TraumaDespite it's location, Atlanta actually had really good radio during the new wave period. There was even a club / art scene here that resembled a mini NYC - Club 688, anyone? Though most of my readers (and myself) are too young to have actually participated in said scene - only dreamt of it while being trapped in the least cool high schools around. |
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| Shiny Happy Hack Jobs |
[Mar. 14th, 2008|11:55 pm] |
"Relaxed designers." That's the way Mitchell Gold and Bob Williams are described. They're relaxed alright - relaxed so much that they don't really design anything!
Mid-century modernism continues to inspire pieces in many collections, but that doesn't mean it's okay to steal. Take the "Flo" lamp table, for instance. It's an exact copy of a 1939 Gilbert Rohde "Cloud" table for Herman Miller. It's not even an interpretation unless you count that it's made in China. On the other hand, it's sturdier than IKEA furniture and costs about 10 percent what a real Rohde piece does.
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| Diner Damnation |
[Feb. 18th, 2008|02:36 pm] |
The short version:
Since the refurb and staff changes, the classic Marietta Diner is no longer classic. Instead there is a confused wait staff, inconsistent food and decor that's as far removed from the diner vibe as you can get. The crowd has changed, too. It seems to be squalling babies at all hours.
The specials have always been pricey, and they try to cover this with generous portions, but who wants an excess of boring sides? I'd rather have a smaller amount of better food.
Unless you need a late night spot, I see no reason not to head a little farther down 41 to the now dramatically superior OK Cafe.
Now I will pick on them because I am a grammar princess. Get a load of the salad description. Mesclun, perhaps? No wonder the food is slipping.
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| Artsy-Fartsy Reality Check |
[Feb. 16th, 2008|12:14 am] |
While I have my hubby and a little green bird who's smarter than some people, I sometimes feel like I couldn't buy a friend. This is quite retarded because I am confident in my own wit and interestingness. I admit that I can be hard to get to know and have complicated interests. What's worse, I haven't really been making an effort to get out there - plus my schedule and location negates the best mingling hours.
I accept responsibility, however I have a tool for evaluating my relative despair that lets me off the hook a little. I call it the Breathless test. At the moment, nobody I know in person has seen or even heard of this obvious Godard film* unless I have introduced it to them, and that's just crazy! Does that really make me that hoity-toity? I mean, it has been parodied on The L Word - not exactly high brow.
On a related note, last year The Plaza screened The 400 Blows. In Atlanta. Are you kidding? I missed it, but I hope the other three people had fun.
*Okay, okay. I'm not going to judge someone over the knowledge of a single film. There are scads of things that are far more important. Still, it says something about where and how I'm living, doesn't it? |
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| I suppose Blipverts are next. |
[Feb. 15th, 2008|10:01 pm] |
Today at the Wal-Mart Supercenter in Marietta I was assaulted! Not by one of the customers but by the directional audio devices suspended around the store and mostly in the check-out lanes. The speakers direct a narrow cone of sound that is heard only by the unlucky sap standing underneath it at an non-ignorable volume almost like earbuds. The audio content is not merely what's on the video panels - it's all sorts of promotional crap! I found it very invasive and disturbing.
I'll have to either plug my ears or carry an iPod. |  |
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| Same Aminizals. Crappy Logo. |
[Feb. 9th, 2008|09:17 pm] |
Animal Planet's old logo has been around quite awhile. It was nothing spectacular, but the new logo is dingo dung. I suppose the designer / committee thought the new logo evoked striped animal markings or African details, but it's simply hard to read the rotated M / 3 / Z - truly stupid.
 In the meantime I extend them forgiveness because the Eukanuba National Championship featured a Japanese Chin in the toy group. The dinky doggy didn't place, but it looks just like the logo for this journal. Once I ditch apartment living, I simply must have one of the little demure things! |
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| ABC embedding Betty |
[Dec. 8th, 2007|10:51 am] |
I just watched this week's episode of Ugly Betty yesterday. I noticed that at least one commercial appeared via a transition instead of a brief moment of black. Ugly Betty is edited with tons of cutesy transitions so it was not immediately evident that the commercial was not part of the show until product popped up.
Now don't get me wrong. I'm all for creative editing, but I don't want programming and advertising to blend this seamlessly. It's bad enough that the television "hour" is trimmed down to all-time shortness, but this is bordering on invasive. If this was in print rather than on tv, there would have to be a disclaimer at the bottom of the page.
What next? America Ferrera breaking character to hawk Maybelline? Actually, that would be extremely quaint rather than something new. |
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| Sleeper Design |
[Nov. 21st, 2007|05:59 pm] |
Belying the satire of Woody Allen's science fiction love letter to Charlie Chaplin is some rather exceptional design. Real post-modern architecture and furnishings are consistent throughout the film, which features Kubrick-esque cinematography to boot.
It's amazing how the current notions of modern designers haven't moved that much beyond this. More progress has been made in execution and manufacturing processes than design per se.
The 15 frames below capture every significant location (save for one observatory) and manufactured design object I could spot. I have identified some, but I need help with the rest. Later I will post a follow-up as a guide for getting the Sleeper look for your own space.
- A rail station?
- Sculptured House, 1963 by Charles Deaton
- FLOS Chiara, 1969 by Mario Bellini
- Heller dinnerware, 1964 by Massimo Vignelli
- Panton Chair (black), 1960 by Verner Panton, unknown chrome table, Arkana chairs & table, Maurice Burke
- This one might be a model.
- Bean bags! I believe these are the original Italian Sakko design, though.
- I have no clue.
- It's not a Xanadu foam home, but what is it?
- JVC Video Sphere
- Marimekko pillows
- JVC Video Capsule TV model 3100 (knocked over on table)
- National Center for Atmospheric Research
- Future McDonald's?
- This might be a composite with a model.
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| Beard cap = Instant Daddy |
[Nov. 15th, 2007|06:42 pm] |
 | In case you haven't seen this already (especially readers of Dwell where I found this), check out the Beard cap Icelandic knit hood by Vík Prjónsdóttir for Scandinavian Grace. Has anyone been to this shop? I assume it is brick and mortar.
This thing is playful but likely itchy (it's wool). Perhaps you crafty knitters can make your own cashmere version. |
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| No sale! |
[Nov. 12th, 2007|01:20 am] |
I bid on Russel Wright items occasionally. In particular, I like early Iroquois "Casual" pieces with the foamy, irregular ice blue glaze, but the picture from this auction makes me want to collect something else! I mean, really, if you're going to show your hands in an auction photo, wouldn't you wash them, clean your nails and cover your open wounds? I don't require that everyone I buy merchandise from be a super hygiene queen, but really...
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| Poster child for subversion |
[Oct. 30th, 2007|12:45 pm] |
 | | Dig the poster I just got from Mondo Tees. After all this time we continue to milk a little joy out of Waters' films. This is probably the cutest depiction of a singing asshole you'll ever see. |
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